He is holy

So it's been almost a year! Wow! I've been pretty busy! Let's see if I can speedily catch you up!

After France, I had a great summer, it was bonkers really but just was intimate with God and secure and life was wonderful :) I went back to college in September which was good, started rehearsals for a play which I had the female lead part in and got really busy. I started to stop spending time with God so I could revise and rehearse.. big mistake. I let my guard down and started caring about people's opinions about me, I started to try and fit in and make people like me more so I told God that though I beleived in him I couldn't spend time with him because I was too busy for him.

The next couple of months was difficult, I just fell on my face over and over again trying to live life my way and chasing things which did not satisfy me. I kept waking up and feeling empty, I missed Jesus so much. So in November, I went to a conference where God revealed his tender, forgiving, unconditionally loving, father's heart for me. I felt him delight in me no matter what I had done and renew me. I went back and felt different but I still wasn't my old self.

I met a guy at work last April but only got to know him well over the summer and especially September onwards. I really liked him and he was such a good guy. There's not many of those aorund; genuinely good guys, but I wasn't aure what he beleived in. We were talking once and I asked him what he was doing for halloween and he said he didn't really do anything; he used to do light parties when he was a kid. I got excited and asked if he was a Christian and he said yes! He said he hadn't been to church for a few years because of working on a Sunday and then going to University but he did beleive in God. So I think I let myself become better friends with him after that, knowing that faith was no longer the big issue. If I had been in the place I was in July I probably wouldn't have encouraged the friendship because I wanted to pursue God first and not get involved with guys but I wasn't in that place, I definitely beleive that this is a good thing and that everything happens for a reason. After that, we've just became closer in our friendship and closer to God too I think, he now comes to my church and seems like he loves it there. I know he'll grow even further over this year and I'm excited to see it! I prayed about him and felt God say 'this is a man of God' and to keep praying for him because God has an awesome plan for his life. We've been together for 4 months now and he is such a gift. Like I said, he is good, a really good guy and he cares a lot for me and always puts me first. That is so important, it means I can really trust him.

Other news, I keep going up and down in the God department, I want to be how I was before but can't seem to get there! Then recently I had a bit of a revelation; God is making me new, not my old self but renewing me. That was cool, I feel safe around God. I've been looking at doing a sort of internship with my church next year but I have to wait for my pastor to give the green light.

On wednesday I went to prayer meeting, God was mind-blowing. We had spontaneous worship and I just worshipped God! I sensed his Holiness in a way I have never done before. He is too good for me. i started bubbling up inside and started singing out in tongues. A woman next to me translated in English and it was exactly my heart's cry... How could Jesus chuck away his crown and come to earth and die for me knowing what I would do, knowing I would turn away and run after things that would not satisfy, how could he still die knowing that I would run away. I am a prodigal child but God loves me and I will give up everything to follow him, whatever he asks!... It was so right and I just wept, God is so amazing! My testimony of the last 6 months is God's unconditional love, it is everlasting and he is good. So good! What a saviour!

After that, I feel so refreshed and full of God's spirit that I know now that nothing will EVER seperate me from the love of God, such a powerful love He has :) What a good God! Went to Alpha again last night, I've been going for the last 4 weeks bringing my friend and brother who haven't always been able to make it but I'm hoping they'll both be there next week. My boyfriend was there too and in our discussion groups everyone was a bit noisy but I noticed that whenever he spoke the table's attention was captured and people listened. He comes out with a lot of wisdom sometimes. I am so honoured to know him and be apart of his life. God has great plans for this man and I want to encourage him to pursue God relentlesly.

I'm currently having driving lessons, which are so much fun! I can't wait to have my own car and be able to drive anywhere  I want, hopefully!

I'm also going to Ukraine in August to help on a children's camp, God is just so in this, I sense his pleasure in me obeying his calling and I'm excited to see Ukraine for the first time! So many cool thing are happening but I think I'll leave that to a seperate post!

I have great friends around me, great family and a GREAT BIG GOD! Who loves me far more than I could ever realise! What a wonderful, beautiful lover to have!

Lots of exciting things are happening really, I'll try and write more often but I have exams coming up so may be revising. Have a good week!

Abbie